The Nursing Mom’s Guide to Business Travel

We’ve all been there – Topless in the parking lot of a Fort Myers Panera, the whir of a Spectra S1 lulling you into a relaxing trance before your client meeting.  Your pump bra is in the trunk in your suitcase, so you just hold those flanges steady while longingly staring at your “Pick 2” lunch, knowing that you won’t have time to eat it.

Pumping and traveling is HARD y’all!  If you’re like me, you try to cram all of your meetings into as few days as possible in an effort to minimize time away from your baby.  You move from car, to airplane, to meeting and back.  Before you know it, your tits are ready to burst, you feel like you’re gonna puke, and BAM plugged ducts or mastitis.   I have learned a LOT in this 14 months (and going) of nursing with almost weekly travel, so I figured I’d share some of my own best practices.

Pack Extras

Whether it be extra pump parts, a spare manual pump, or a backup battery, pack a Plan B.  Too many times I have forgotten just ONE tiny piece of my pump, or the battery pack.  Nobody wants to hand express into an airplane bathroom sink or Uber to the closet Walmart between meetings.  No one. My new go to is to pack my Spectra, and then to also pack my manual pump.  That way if I need to pump in the car, or my seat on the airplane, I’ve got options. If I end up forgetting a flange, a duckbill, whatever, I have a second option to hold me over until I can get a replacement part or until I go home.  Also, remember extra milk bottles/bags just in case!  I often underestimate how much I pump in a 24 hour period.

Pick Your Target

If you’re flying, do some research on the airports that you’re flying out of and into to see if there are nursing rooms available.  Pumping in a bathroom stall should be your absolute last option. Would you want to eat food that was prepared in a bathroom stall?  Neither does your baby!  Say that to anyone who suggests that that’s a good option.  I especially love saying that to unsuspecting men.

Major hubs like Atlanta, Miami, Houston and Charlotte have either nursing suites or MamaVa nursing pods.  Consult the Google before you fly so you can find out if pumping before you take off, after you land, or during a layover (or all three) are an option.  Some MamaVa pods require the app in order to unlock the nursing pod, so download that first if you plan to use one.

Know Thine TSA Protocol

I have had a fabulous experience with TSA as a breastfeeding mom.  There was only one tiny snafu in which a newer TSA agent tried to tell me that I could only have 3 oz bottles of breastmilk.  I kindly pointed her towards a copy of the TSA rules, she brought her manager over, and I was on my way.  In general though, I have had some of the sweetest men and women congratulate me on extended breastfeeding, and share some of their own family’s breastfeeding journeys.  Don’t stress!

A few things to note:

  • You might want to print out the TSA rules for traveling with breastmilk just in case someone is having a bad day and gives you a hard time.  You can find them HERE
  • If your milk and your ice pack are frozen solid, they do not need to run your milk through the machine to test it.  If they are partially thawed – to the machine with you!
  • I like to tell the agents at the front of the belt that I have breastmilk. They tell the person looking in the little X-ray TV, and then they know what they’re looking a when 60oz of liquids show up on their screen
  • Pack your milk in bottles, if possible – Since each individual bag or bottle will be run through the machine, I prefer to use something sturdier, like a Medela storage bottle to avoid potential puncture and spillage of my milk sweat and tears

Call ahead

Call ahead to your hotel to make sure that there is a fridge in your room, and if there isn’t ask if they can have one waiting for you when you arrive.  Call again on your way to the hotel in case housekeeping never got the memo, so you don’t have to waste time waiting around for it.  I have gotten stuck there waiting for housekeeping to arrive while I nervously counted down the minutes until I had to leave for a client meeting.  Worst case, you can always put your milk in the ice bucket and fill it with ice to keep it cool while you’re out, but I prefer the cooling continuity of a fridge.

ind out where it is in relation to your meetings and sessions so you can figure out when you will hit the Mother’s Room. Many times it will just be a spare meeting room that they set aside for nursing moms and give you a key to enter. I suggest facing away from the door (if you give a crap) — I’ve been walked in on many times. The conference staff aren’t accustomed to using those rooms as Mother’s Rooms and sometimes forget. Meh.

Stay Cool

Figuring out how the f*** to keep your milk cool all day while you’re out and about shaking hands and dealing deals is a challenge.  As if you need one more thing to worry about as you lug your pump bag, laptop and suitcase around a strange city!  

On the way there, I prefer to bring some small ice packs that I’ve gotten from home meal services.  That way if I lose one or have to toss it, no big deal. Once those suckers have melted, if keeping the milk in the fridge isn’t an option, I also bring some spare Ziplocs with me, and fill them with ice at my hotel, or ask a server to bring me some ice when I’m out to lunch. If I’m in a real pinch, I’ll hit up the Starbucks, order a coffee with a Venti cup of ice on the side, and fill up several milk storage bags and surround my expressed milk with them. Ive had some leaks from using straight up ice, but my precious cargo remained cool and drinkable, so that was ok with me.

Get it In Where You Can Fit it In

It is HARD to find both the time and the place to pump while on a road trip.  I’m no stranger to manually expressing on the highway to the tune of Back Dat Azz Up, for example.  I often have to travel with my (male) boss from meeting to meeting, and he has little concept of what the pumping life requires, nor do I care to share.  To avoid mastitis and to make sure I don’t negatively affect my milk supply by neglecting my sweater puppets, I have to get creative.  This sometimes means wearing a hands free bra under my work clothes so that I can hook up a battery to my pump, and pumping on the drive to and from the airport.

For Longer Trips

If you’re going to be away for 3 days or more, or if you’re a mass producer, you might consider shipping your milk home.  Milk Stork is a pricy, but fantastic solution to ship breastmilk home to your baby and caretaker.  A few things to be aware of when shipping with Milk Stork:

  • If you’re traveling over the weekend for work and you ship on a Saturday, your milk will arrive on Monday. Similarly, there are no Sunday shipments.  Milk Stork ships through FedEx, and these are carrier limitations.
  • They have no control over weather, or FedEx delays.  II, unfortunately found this out first hand when there were several days of intense fog, and my milk was delayed several days.  Luckily, their ice packs last for up to 72 hours, so my milk arrived in great shape despite the lag time.  To prepare for potential delays, make sure that you have enough milk to hold baby over for the entire trip and use this service to get your milk home safely and hassle free rather than as a means to feed baby while you’re away.

You Got This

Being both a nursing and a working mom means disposing of that very last fuck that you have to give, and pumping in your airplane seat or in a parked car.  We’re doing the very best that we can for our babies, and we should take no prisoners and give no apologies.

What are your travel hacks when traveling without baby?  I’m still nursing, and still learning, and I’d love to hear your pro tips!  

Baby Led Weaning Explained [Foul Language]

“Baby Led Weaning”  is a method of introducing solids to your chunk that allows your baby to feed himself.  Attributed to Jill Rapley, author of Baby-Led Weaning and Helping Your Baby to Love Good Food, BLW promotes sensory play through different tastes, colors and flavors just as much as it promotes healthy eating.  To me, this approach is a logical, fun way to introduce babies to solids that doesn’t involve force feeding, artificially preserved slop.  

“What the fuck?”

You might think, when you first hear about Baby Led Weaning.  “My baby regularly hits himself in the face!  How the hell is he going to get food into that slobber factory of an adorable mouth?”

The answer is, he probably won’t.  In the early months, Baby Led Weaning (BLW) is about sensory play and exploration more than it is about getting food into his little body.  As us crunchy and crispy moms love to recite as our mantra, “Food before one is just for fun”.  Baby’s primary source of nutrition should still be breast milk or formula, and table foods are complimentary.

“But why not purees?”

Isn’t there scientific research that says that pureed foods are best for babies?  Nah, bruh.  Pureed baby foods, particularly those in cans and jars became popular during the Great Depression when people couldn’t afford fresh, nutritious foods, and moms had to spend more time away from their babies working in factories.  This was the same time that prune pudding was all the rage, so…yeah.  This articlein National Geographic gives a great history of the baby food we know today.  If you decide that purees are the best fit for your baby, they’re super easy to make yourself, and you can freeze them ahead.

“Won’t my baby choke?”

If done safely, there’s not a big chance that your baby will actually choke (true choking is when the airway becomes partially or fully blocked).  A 2016 study cited on the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) site, comparied incidences of choking in infants who self-fed and infants who were fed purees by their parents from antenatal to 9 months. Though 35% of all infants had at least one choking event, there was no significant difference in the number of choking incidences of baby led feeders versus those fed by caretakers. Gagging is a much more realistic possibility as baby learns to navigate how much food to put in his mouth, how to chew, etc.  When you begin BLW, your baby won’t have fine motor skills or a very refined “pincer grasp”, so you’ll cut food into long, thin strips that are long enough for baby to grasp, leaving some food poking out from his tiny triumphant fist.  As he sharpens his skillz, you’ll be able to serve smaller items like peas, corn, etc.  Small, round fruits like grapes and blueberries should be cut into quarters or halves or squashed to avoid choking.  Finally, whole nuts, popcorn, and slices of hotdog or circular shaped, hard meats should never be given to baby until baby is no longer a baby…baby.

“So does this mean that we’re weaning now?”

No!  This should really be called “Baby Led Feeding”.  Let that little milk smuggler have at it for as long as you both are comfortable nursing.  As I learned from my local La Leche League, it is very uncommon for a baby to self-wean before 18 months, and the purpose of this approach to feeding is not to encourage baby to wean – it’s to explore, play and learn.  Make sure that you are keeping breast milk or formula as your baby’s primary source of nutrition for at least the first year, and always offer the boob or the bottle before you offer solids.  I like to offer the boob one hour before offering solids, and immediately after he eats to wash them down.

“So what do I start with?”

“Real” and “hard core” Baby Led Weaning moms, dads, and caretakers feed baby everything that they eat from day one.  Another core principal of BLW centers around involving baby in family meal time, which means that she eats what you eat, when you eat it, no exceptions.  We modified this in our family because we’re anarchist rule-breakers, and we started with long strips of avocado.  We later moved on to sweet potatoes, bananas, and roasted or sauteed zucchini.  I originally said to myself that I would only do veggies and add fruits later so that Lawless didn’t develop a sweet tooth, but a banana was the first thing that he grabbed out of my hand, and it didn’t make a lick of a difference.  He loves spinach, peas, asparagus – you name it, he eats it.  Do steer clear of any added salt, sugar and processed foods – if you give those to your baby, you’re a she-devil. 

“This sounds awesome – When can we start?”

Research suggests that all babies should wait until at least 6 months before being introduced to solids to ensure that their guts are mature enough to handle digesting them.  Benefits of waiting until 6 months to start solids include decreased chance of unpleasant symptoms like gas, tummy aches, and constipation, and increased immunity if you are breastfeeding.

In addition to waiting until at least months, your baby should be able to sit unassisted (with no help from you or a seat), is starting to develop a pincer grasp and can pick up some smaller items, is interested in food and grabs for it, and has lost the tongue-thrust reflex and no longer automatically spits food out.

“Sign me up.”

Start stocking up on wall-to-wall tarps for your kitchen floor and tell the dog it’s about to be Christmas in July (and to stop mean mugging the baby because they’re about to be best friends).  Baby Led Weaning is a messy, hilarious and FUN way of introducing your baby to family meal time.  Get ready to be amazed at what you little one is capable of, and to flood Facebook with pictures of your kid with oatmeal covering every square inch of his body, making each and every one of our single friends gag (but not choke) simultaneously.

Stop Diagnosing Your Baby

Let me start by saying – I’m not a doctor or a medical professional.  Sometimes our babies really are sick and we need to listen to our “mama gut” (I hate that term), assess the situation, and sometimes seek medical care.  That’s a fact.

But sometimes, babies are just babies.  Sometimes moms are tired, and they want to believe that there’s a reason that their 8-week old newborn baby is crying every day at 6pm, won’t sleep in her crib, or refuses the breast.  We’re so quick to look for something that we can fix; she has reflux, she has colic, she’s “not getting enough” milk, she doesn’t like laying flat, she’s allergic to dairy, soy, nightshades, air… 

Or maybe, she just spent 10 months is a dark, cozy cave where all of her needs were provided for, and she was recently expelled into a cold, bright, noisy environment full of new everythings.  If you think there’s a medical issue, by all means, do your parental duty and take the baby in to the doctor.  But please know that almost every baby cries.  You probably don’t have  a “high needs” baby or a “difficult” baby.  You ain’t special.  Babies cry.

Crying

Babies do this.  Especially from about 2-12 weeks.  It. Is. Rough.  Especially for mom, who is now hardwired to feel like she’s being lit on fire when baby cries.  But this is a very normal developmental phase.  You may notice that it happens at the same time every day, or that it happens for hours.  If baby is fed, warm enough, cool enough, and his diaper is dry, it might just be your baby being a baby.  Some call it the “witching hour”, but I like the explanations on the Period of PURPLE Crying.  

If you’re very worried, call your midwife, or your baby’s pediatrician, but tell that doctor to put the prescription pad down for just a minute.  Or keep it out, and you can decide if it’s necessary to fill the prescription.  Because there may not be a medical cause for baby’s crying other than normal mental development.  And that’s ok.

What can you do?

  • Pour yourself a glass of wine (drink plenty of water as well, and don’t get too tipsy.  After all, you’ve got a baby to hold.  And yes, you can drink a glass of wine and breastfeed)
  • Give the baby to your partner for a little while if you can stomach it.  Those hormones are a beast and it might feel all wrong to give baby to dad, your partner, or Grandma.  But if you can handle it, give baby to one of the aforementioned to rock, bounce, or sing to while you stay close and curl up on the couch for a catnap.  You need it.
  • Bounce on a yoga ball with the baby.  A high school friend taught me this one via Facebook message when I told her what a little PITA Lawless was being.  It worked!  Granted he would cry as soon as we stopped bouncing, but…it worked!
  • Swaddle the baby.  So many people say “My baby hates being swaddled”.  Your baby doesn’t hate being swaddled.  You hate swaddling your baby because she squirms and cries.  But I tell you, when you get her in that perfect tight swaddle and she settles down and closes her eyes, you will naysay no longer.  Our doulas, Ashley & Evangeline, taught us the double swaddle technique, and it was a winner.  Give it a whirl.
  • Nurse, nurse, nurse!  When in doubt, take your boob out.  Or offer a bottle.  Teeny tiny babies nurse frequently – from 12-7 million times a day.  There’s no harm in offering.
  • Burp, burp, burp!  If you think gas is the culprit, which it many times is because baby’s digestive system is about as basic as North Face jacket, try burping the baby.  I’ve recently read that over your shoulder might not be the best way to help baby relax, so try propping baby on your lap with her chin between your thumb and pointer finger in a “V”, and rub her little back to help her relax and get the burp out.  You can also try this “I Love You” massage if you think baby’s gas is trapped in her tummy.

Refusing to Sleep in the Crib or Bassinet

Psssst…  Guess what?  Your baby has spent his entire life nestled in your womb.  It was literally the best and he was literally attached to you.  Now you want him to sleep by himself???

I’m all for “Back is Best”, and for the ding dongs that can’t be trusted not to drink or do drugs or prescription meds, baby should be in a crib or bassinet next to the bed to keep baby safe…and to prevent him from absorbing whatever moron vapor those idiots exhale.  But for those of us responsible, tax paying individuals who can research and create a deliberate, safe sleep space, in my humble opinion, bed-sharing is your best option.  I will deep dive on this in another post, but the quick and dirty:

  • Never sleep with baby on a couch, recliner, futon or chair, only on a flat surface like a bed
  • Back is still best
  • The sleep surface should be firm
  • Sorry mom, but keep pillows and blankets off of the bed.  Wear pants or whatever you need to keep warm, but no blankets or pillows
  • Sheets should be tight fitting, so only use the fitted sheet, no top sheet that could end up covering the baby’s face
  • Make sure that there are no gaps between the mattress and headboard, or between the bed and the wall where baby could get trapped and suffocate
  • Baby must be breastfed.  Sorry moms, but formula and bottle fed babies cannot safely bed share
  • If you’re wagging your finger and shaking your head at me for bed sharing, you do you.  Try keeping baby close by in a side car or next to your bedside so you can quickly retrieve him when he needs you in the middle of the night

For the best, safe bed sharing guidelines, James McKenna is the ultimate resource and provides detailed, Safe Cosleeping Guidelines 

Baby is Refusing the Breast

Oh man, this one is frustrating and makes you feel so helpless.  Boobs are supposed to cure everything, right?  There are some things that might make baby refuse the breast, but not to worry – she’ll come back. 

Before you go down the road of “I just think I’m not making enough milk” or “she just doesn’t seem satisfied after nursing”, put down that can of formula (unless you choose to formula feed, in which case, pick it back up).  There is a very good chance that your body is making exactly what your baby needs.  Unfortunately pediatricians are not lactation consultants, and they often urge moms to crack open that can.  If you really want to breastfeed, please contact an IBCLC who is uniquely qualified to advise and diagnose all that is breastfeeding.

There could be bigger issues like a tongue or lip tie (or both), or an issue with milk transfer, or it could be something completely manageable like one of the following:

  • Baby has to burp.  You may have burped her already, but those little suckers get air trapped in their tiny bodies at every turn.  If baby is trying to latch and keeps crying, try burping her for a little while first to see if you can relax her and release any trapped air
  • You have a forceful letdown – Does your baby seem like she has to gulp and gasp when she’s nursing, especially when you first start to nurse?  Your milk might be coming at her like a firehose.  Kelly Mom is my breastfeeding bible and she has a great list of signs of a forceful letdown
  • You have a slow letdown – Some babies are just impatient.  You might notice her kneading your breast trying to hurry your milk the hell up.  This is a tough one, because letdown can be slowed by mom’s anxiety, nervousness, etc., and baby fussing can cause all of these things.  Your best bet is to get yourself in your own little nursing corner, sip some water, smell your baby’s sweet head, feel her soft little skin, and try to relax as best as you can.  It will happen mama – your body was made for this!
  • She’s not hungry, but she wants to nurse for comfort, and your pesky milk keeps coming out.  Baby doesn’t always nurse because she’s hungry.  She might just want to be close to mama – the sucking motion is one of her greatest soothers.  If baby is a little bit older (over 6 weeks), you can try a newborn paci
  • She’s distracted – Right around 12 weeks, baby starts to take in more of the world around her, and she also has a greater field of vision.  This causes a lot of distractions because everything is brand new
  • Thrush – If you notice a white film on your baby’s tongue that is difficult to remove with a wet cloth, it could be thrush.  Thrush can make nursing uncomfortable for you and baby
  • Teething 
  • Baby has a cold

Some Other Things to Consider

All of the above said, of course you want to be vigilant and make sure that baby has a good output of wet and dirty diapers, has periods where she is not crying, and that she is gaining weight each time you visit the ped.  When in doubt, take the baby to the doctor – better safe than sorry, and no one will ever judge you for being safe.  Here are few additional, more serious items to keep an eye out for:

  • Pyloric Stenosis – If baby starts throwing up clear liquid around 2-3 weeks, to the hospital you shall go
  • If baby is not gaining weight, call an IBCLC right away.  If you are military, you might have access to one on base.  You can also contact your local La Leche League leader for advice, and potentially a home visit.  My local LLL leader, Jen, is beyond helpful and generous with her time
  • Intestinal Obstruction – If baby has a lump in the abdomen, vomiting, stool mixed with blood and mucus….call your doctor

Do serious, scary things happen to our babies sometimes?  Yes.  But many times your baby is just doing what babies do.  Taking in her big new world, and communicating as best as she can, the only way that she knows how right now – Crying.  Hang in there mama (and partners)!  You’re doing a GREAT job, and your baby loves you.